Is there a 12 Step Program For Bad Cooks?

Oh, my gosh! I need a 12 step program. I put eggs on to boil & ran upstairs to get my calendar. But I saw I had a few emails & began answering them. Then the phone rang & I talked for about 15 minutes. I checked my emails again & realized the attachment I had tried to send did not go through so I sent it again. I heard a funny sound downstairs but thought it was the neighbor children playing with firecrackers in preparation for July 4th. I began to fret about them setting those off late at night on the 4th and got mad already about the noise to come. I heard another sound & thought I better hurry & finish this email & check it out. Something was starting to smell. Gee, I better wait on the email & see what that is. As you have guessed, the eggs exploding were the sounds I heard. White & yellow matted debris lined the wall behind the stove & the floor. The kitchen smelled like my 10th grade chemistry classroom. Oh, you may think me a fool, but at least I did not pick up the pot with my bare hand, but used a towel to get it to the sink. Sigh. Good thing Marty is gone for four days. Maybe by then the smell will be gone.