Have you ever been in a nice restaurant, Macy's china department or even Home Depot and seen children out of control and exasperated parents? Years ago I was just such a parent with two wild little boys making me crazy while my husband and I shopped at Home Depot. Each boy got a swat on the rear and we all came home miserable.
Once we were home and the kids banished to their rooms, I called my mother-in-law to vent. She said, "Dahlin, never take your children places where they have to be bad." Well, what did that mean? She said stores like Home Depot are not made for children and a long trip to a store like that is asking for trouble. She said it was the same principle with a nice restaurant. "That's why there are Chili's, Red Robin & other loud restaurants that welcome families and even have children's menus."
Common sense told me her words were true and wise. I felt terrible for swatting them and realized I was the one who needed to be spanked for taking them somewhere they had to be bad. Perhaps, dropping me at a playground with the boys would have been a better choice while my husband hit Home Depot. Lord knows he would have loved not being rushed through his favorite store.
So, next time gals, think about where you are going and if it might just be better suited to go without the kids.
January 28, 2010
October 14, 2009
Discouragement a Choice?
Recently, I read an article by Rick Warren titled "Discouragement Is a Choice". Typically, I would not counter anything Rick Warren would state, but this one caused me to ask the question of myself. His article gave reasons why we allow discouragement to consume us. However, it seems to me it is actually a choice on my part to be the inflictor of discouragement or to encourage.
Warren's article quoted passages from Nehemiah as the people became weary of rebuilding the wall, especially when the "nay-sayers" continually chipped away at their efforts. This can happen to us, too, can't it? A trial may seem to go on forever fearing the weight of the debris will never lift. But that's where God instructed Nehemiah to go to the people and give them courage to continue. He gave them ideas and a plan to move forward. Sometimes I need someone to grieve with me, but also to give me reason to get up from my pit of dispair.
Many of us have seen people pull away when they are discouraged. Unfortunately, we may not always realize they are going through something so we don't think to pursue them. But I wonder, do we really not see they are in pain? Perhaps they said something hurtful to us and we now stand offended. The Holy Spirit may be asking our heart at this point, "You have a choice to encourage and reach out or you have the choice to discourage by leaving them as they are."
Now wait a minute! It's not my fault they are in this mess. I didn't do anything wrong so why is the monkey on my back to be the encourager?
"A new commandment I give you to love one another." John 13:34
"By this all men will know you are My disciples if you love one another." John 13:35
"This is My commandment that you love one another, just as I have loved you." John 15:12
"Just as I have loved you." Well, that's our answer to the question whether to chose to encourage. Jesus did not wait for us to figure our situation out. He was hurt by our decisions. But while we were yet in our sin and pain, He died for us. He reached out to us and calls to be His hands and feet to a troubled world...and even a troubled acquaintance.
Oh, Lord help us to remember how You reached down to us. Help us to remember how others have responded to Your Holy Spirit to be Your hands and feet. Help us to make the choice to be Jesus to others and choose to encourage.
Warren's article quoted passages from Nehemiah as the people became weary of rebuilding the wall, especially when the "nay-sayers" continually chipped away at their efforts. This can happen to us, too, can't it? A trial may seem to go on forever fearing the weight of the debris will never lift. But that's where God instructed Nehemiah to go to the people and give them courage to continue. He gave them ideas and a plan to move forward. Sometimes I need someone to grieve with me, but also to give me reason to get up from my pit of dispair.
Many of us have seen people pull away when they are discouraged. Unfortunately, we may not always realize they are going through something so we don't think to pursue them. But I wonder, do we really not see they are in pain? Perhaps they said something hurtful to us and we now stand offended. The Holy Spirit may be asking our heart at this point, "You have a choice to encourage and reach out or you have the choice to discourage by leaving them as they are."
Now wait a minute! It's not my fault they are in this mess. I didn't do anything wrong so why is the monkey on my back to be the encourager?
"A new commandment I give you to love one another." John 13:34
"By this all men will know you are My disciples if you love one another." John 13:35
"This is My commandment that you love one another, just as I have loved you." John 15:12
"Just as I have loved you." Well, that's our answer to the question whether to chose to encourage. Jesus did not wait for us to figure our situation out. He was hurt by our decisions. But while we were yet in our sin and pain, He died for us. He reached out to us and calls to be His hands and feet to a troubled world...and even a troubled acquaintance.
Oh, Lord help us to remember how You reached down to us. Help us to remember how others have responded to Your Holy Spirit to be Your hands and feet. Help us to make the choice to be Jesus to others and choose to encourage.
October 8, 2009
I'm Such a Kid
Recently, while serving my 2 year old grandson breakfast, I got a glimpse of how I might be seen by God. My grandson was very attentive to me as I continued to dish out the bananas, eggs and toast. He happily patted his fingers together using the sign for "more" of his favorites. He laughed with me and watched me closely which made my heart sing. However, after his tummy filled he lost interest. He was now so satisfied he didn't even bother to give me the sign for "all done". He simply ignored me.
As I sat there trying to get his attention again, I wondered how often I had turned away from the Lord after my momentary need was met. How many times has the Lord given to me but having my fill I moved my thoughts elsewhere. My spirit felt a stab of pain when my grandson had finished with me and I asked God's forgiveness for the times "I'm such a kid." And yet, wasn't it Jesus who said we needed to be like a child to see heaven? I looked at my grandson again and felt such love, even though he was more interested in a bird outside, and thought about how great is our God to love us in our selfish ways.
God remembers that we are dust and showers us with mercy. I don't expect my grandson to praise me for his breakfast...yet. He is just a toddler and doesn't understand all that is done for his good. He just receives. In a short period of time, he will understand the importance of a thankful heart. As Christians grow in our faith, we too understand the importance of giving praise and honoring the One who saved us and provides for our needs according to His riches in glory, in Christ Jesus.
As I sat there trying to get his attention again, I wondered how often I had turned away from the Lord after my momentary need was met. How many times has the Lord given to me but having my fill I moved my thoughts elsewhere. My spirit felt a stab of pain when my grandson had finished with me and I asked God's forgiveness for the times "I'm such a kid." And yet, wasn't it Jesus who said we needed to be like a child to see heaven? I looked at my grandson again and felt such love, even though he was more interested in a bird outside, and thought about how great is our God to love us in our selfish ways.
God remembers that we are dust and showers us with mercy. I don't expect my grandson to praise me for his breakfast...yet. He is just a toddler and doesn't understand all that is done for his good. He just receives. In a short period of time, he will understand the importance of a thankful heart. As Christians grow in our faith, we too understand the importance of giving praise and honoring the One who saved us and provides for our needs according to His riches in glory, in Christ Jesus.
May 28, 2009
Becoming the Empty Chair
One of my friends from high school, recently hugged her son Kris good-bye as he headed for a six month deploymet to Baghdad. Kris is an Air Force captain serving in the JAG (Judge Advocate General) office there. His career as a lawyer uniquely qualified him for this position in Iraq to help get that country ready for the transition to self rule.
Kris calls his blog, "Becoming the Empty Chair". I have read all of his entries, which are filled with insight and wisdom intensified by his experience in Iraq. I have considered this profound title and come up with what it means for me as I ponder this young man's faith in the midst of constant danger. One could imagine the "Empty Chair" is what he sees when he remembers the breakfast table of his home in Athens, GA where his brother and parents are gathered. Rather, I see Kris becoming less of himself and more like Christ. Don't get me wrong, Kris is scared, lonely and longing for a hug. Yet, I see a God granted trust exemplified as he writes. His blog writings will be complied into a book upon his return. I think of the following Psalm as one that expresses his position and calling:
"Whom have I in heaven but Thee? And besides Thee, I desire nothing on earth. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strenth of my heart and my portion forever. For behold, those who are far from Thee will perish; Thou hast destroyed all those who are unfaithful to Thee. But as for me, the nearness of God is my good; I have made the Lord God my refuge, that I may tell of all Thy works." Psalm 73:25 - 28
Songwriter, Bob Fitts' song, "He Will Come & Save" has become my prayer for Kris. The words are:
Say to those who are fearful hearted, "Do not be afraid; the Lord your God is strong and with His mighty arm, when you call out His name." He will come and save.
He will come and save you. He will come and save you. Say to the weary one, "Your God will surely come." He will come and save you. Lift up your eyes to Him, you will arise again. He will come and save you.
Say to those who are broken hearted, "Do not lose your faith; the Lord your God is strong with His loving arms, when you call out His name." He will come and save.
I have committed to pray for Kris daily during his deployment, but devoted a special time on Memorial Day with friends. He had sent the following words which were quite fitting for all who have served and are serving:
"A veteran- whether active duty, retired, national guard, or reserve: is someone who at one point in his/her life, wrote a blank check made payable to The United States of America for an amount "up to and including my life." In looking and reflecting on this quote for a few moments, the focus of the sentence is obviously the sacrifice. I believe that is the more striking of the messages of the quote. Given that I so long to go home with new hope growing on distant shores, I certainly empathize with the thought that I've handed my life in the form of a blank check towards a more noble purpose. The less obvious point of the quote is contained in one word: "wrote." This point, certainly present, standing in the center of the quote, is easily overshadowed by the concept of sacrifice. I chose to be here, to do this. Embracing this choice has ironically been the act which has set me free. In my Strength For Service devotional on the 21st of May, I was reminded of Isaiah's response to God's call in Isaiah 6:8. God calls Isaiah to fulfill his calling asking "Whom shall I send", and Isaiah, simply, gracefully, and powerfully responds, "here I am Lord; send me."
Jesus asked three times for "this cup to pass" but accepted God's will and was in agreement with the Father. Kris would like to get away from the forty pounds of weight he must carry to protect him; the 120 degree heat and the constant awareness he must have of his surroundings. Yet, Kris has accepted and is in agreement with the Father as to this "cup". He will drink this cup in whatever form the Lord chooses as he becomes the empty chair. All the while his vessel is overflowing.
Non Nobis Domine! Not to us but to Thy Name be the glory.
Kris calls his blog, "Becoming the Empty Chair". I have read all of his entries, which are filled with insight and wisdom intensified by his experience in Iraq. I have considered this profound title and come up with what it means for me as I ponder this young man's faith in the midst of constant danger. One could imagine the "Empty Chair" is what he sees when he remembers the breakfast table of his home in Athens, GA where his brother and parents are gathered. Rather, I see Kris becoming less of himself and more like Christ. Don't get me wrong, Kris is scared, lonely and longing for a hug. Yet, I see a God granted trust exemplified as he writes. His blog writings will be complied into a book upon his return. I think of the following Psalm as one that expresses his position and calling:
"Whom have I in heaven but Thee? And besides Thee, I desire nothing on earth. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strenth of my heart and my portion forever. For behold, those who are far from Thee will perish; Thou hast destroyed all those who are unfaithful to Thee. But as for me, the nearness of God is my good; I have made the Lord God my refuge, that I may tell of all Thy works." Psalm 73:25 - 28
Songwriter, Bob Fitts' song, "He Will Come & Save" has become my prayer for Kris. The words are:
Say to those who are fearful hearted, "Do not be afraid; the Lord your God is strong and with His mighty arm, when you call out His name." He will come and save.
He will come and save you. He will come and save you. Say to the weary one, "Your God will surely come." He will come and save you. Lift up your eyes to Him, you will arise again. He will come and save you.
Say to those who are broken hearted, "Do not lose your faith; the Lord your God is strong with His loving arms, when you call out His name." He will come and save.
I have committed to pray for Kris daily during his deployment, but devoted a special time on Memorial Day with friends. He had sent the following words which were quite fitting for all who have served and are serving:
"A veteran- whether active duty, retired, national guard, or reserve: is someone who at one point in his/her life, wrote a blank check made payable to The United States of America for an amount "up to and including my life." In looking and reflecting on this quote for a few moments, the focus of the sentence is obviously the sacrifice. I believe that is the more striking of the messages of the quote. Given that I so long to go home with new hope growing on distant shores, I certainly empathize with the thought that I've handed my life in the form of a blank check towards a more noble purpose. The less obvious point of the quote is contained in one word: "wrote." This point, certainly present, standing in the center of the quote, is easily overshadowed by the concept of sacrifice. I chose to be here, to do this. Embracing this choice has ironically been the act which has set me free. In my Strength For Service devotional on the 21st of May, I was reminded of Isaiah's response to God's call in Isaiah 6:8. God calls Isaiah to fulfill his calling asking "Whom shall I send", and Isaiah, simply, gracefully, and powerfully responds, "here I am Lord; send me."
Jesus asked three times for "this cup to pass" but accepted God's will and was in agreement with the Father. Kris would like to get away from the forty pounds of weight he must carry to protect him; the 120 degree heat and the constant awareness he must have of his surroundings. Yet, Kris has accepted and is in agreement with the Father as to this "cup". He will drink this cup in whatever form the Lord chooses as he becomes the empty chair. All the while his vessel is overflowing.
Non Nobis Domine! Not to us but to Thy Name be the glory.
April 7, 2009
Stepping Into Mary's Shoes
As I ponder Good Friday's approach, I am struck by what might have been going through Mary's mind as she stood at the foot of the Cross watching the injustice.
I imagine what I would feel...
"STOP! THIS IS MY SON!"
In her grief, does she pause from her tears in shock to see the soldiers strip Jesus and then cast lots for His tunic? Does anger temporarily replace the tears as she shouts, "STOP! THIS IS MY SON!" While the other two Mary's and her sister hold her back, does she then collapse in their arms weakly sobbing, "Father, make them stop, this is my son."
Unaware, the One who made her looks down from the Cross with compassion. Mary stares at a dark spot in the dirt and looks up to His hand dripping blood.
I imagine what I would feel...
"STOP! THIS IS MY SON!"
In her grief, does she pause from her tears in shock to see the soldiers strip Jesus and then cast lots for His tunic? Does anger temporarily replace the tears as she shouts, "STOP! THIS IS MY SON!" While the other two Mary's and her sister hold her back, does she then collapse in their arms weakly sobbing, "Father, make them stop, this is my son."
Unaware, the One who made her looks down from the Cross with compassion. Mary stares at a dark spot in the dirt and looks up to His hand dripping blood.
- Does she remember holding that little baby's hand as she nursed Him?
- Does she remember holding that little boy's hand as He stopped her to stare at a rainbow?
- Does she remember touching His hand as a young man when He seemed so distracted by a lamb being led to slaughter?
- That hand now nailed to a tree.
She gasps as she follows that dripping hand to the face of Jesus realizing His gaze is locked onto her. Even in all His pain, she sees the love not of her son, but her Savior.
- As the disciple John draws near to comfort her, all she had pondered in her heart becomes clear and Jesus speaks, "Woman, behold your son!" And to John, "Son, behold your mother."
- Jesus provided for Mary's welfare He provides for us, too.
Like Mary, we can ponder and keep all He is in our hearts and be eager for His will to be accomplished in our lives. Then, like Mary, as we remember this day and bear witness to all Jesus has done.
God's Son, my Savior!
April 4, 2009
"got love?"
I speak often at women's retreats, but it never gets old or routine. All are good, but this past weekend was special. We met at a conference ground east of Redding and this retreat was to be the last one the grounds would host since they were turning the camp into a full time boarding school for troubled boys. Knowing it was the last weekend made it special to the camp employees and we all chose to strive to help them end well.
That alone was reason to praise God for a good weekend, but He had much more in store for us. I had met with the retreat team two times and been in constant email communication with them for months. The last time we met, I asked them if they planned to come home from the retreat unchanged. All said NO! They wanted to be changed and began praying that way for all the women. The way had been prepared for the Holy Spirit's work and hearts were changed as early as the first night.
Like most retreats that I do, we have small group time after the sessions. I prepare the questions and they spend about 15 - 20 minutes getting to know each other better and talking about the session. Friday night they were still going 45 minutes later. The women were sharing and becoming transparent right off the bat! (This typically does not happen until after the Saturday a.m. session.) Saturday morning we had to make them stop so we could get to lunch. The afternoon free-time offered a great time of ministering of the ladies. Everywhere I looked gals were spending time encouraging others. It was beautiful.
By Saturday evening, we felt the Lord's leading to change the schedule up so there would be no interruption of the small group time. We started with the message, then worship, then communion and finished with celebratory worship which lifted the women to amazing praise for all the Lord had done in their hearts. Their final small group time allowed time to see where they had been, the change needed and the prayers and encouragement from their small group members to stand with them as God continued to work as they return home.
There were a couple of little things I brought to the retreat thinking it might be nice to do, but found God using it as breakthroughs for women. One "little" addition was a verse and prayer on a small piece of paper rolled up and tied like a scroll. (There were about nine different passages and a related prayer on each.) I asked the retreat coordinator just to put them on the ladies' chairs on Sunday morning. I was shocked and awed by what happened. Women came in, read their scrolls and were commenting and giving testimony that this verse and prayer was EXACTLY what they needed that morning. One woman said it was the verse she had been given at last year's retreat and someone a week before had quoted it to her again. She said, "No accident here! God wants me to know and believe His word." Another woman had sat in the same seat for each session, but Sunday morning moved to the next chair. The scroll on the new chair was God's message to her. Out of curiosity, she asked the woman in the other chair she had been in all weekend what her scroll verse and prayer were. It was NOT what she needed. God loved her so much, He even had her sit in another seat and gave her His individual word He prepared just for her.
The theme of this weekend was "got love?" God showed His love afresh to all to the point where each of the women attending, if asked if they "got love?" would say, "Oh, yeah!" This was indeed a special women's retreat.
That alone was reason to praise God for a good weekend, but He had much more in store for us. I had met with the retreat team two times and been in constant email communication with them for months. The last time we met, I asked them if they planned to come home from the retreat unchanged. All said NO! They wanted to be changed and began praying that way for all the women. The way had been prepared for the Holy Spirit's work and hearts were changed as early as the first night.
Like most retreats that I do, we have small group time after the sessions. I prepare the questions and they spend about 15 - 20 minutes getting to know each other better and talking about the session. Friday night they were still going 45 minutes later. The women were sharing and becoming transparent right off the bat! (This typically does not happen until after the Saturday a.m. session.) Saturday morning we had to make them stop so we could get to lunch. The afternoon free-time offered a great time of ministering of the ladies. Everywhere I looked gals were spending time encouraging others. It was beautiful.
By Saturday evening, we felt the Lord's leading to change the schedule up so there would be no interruption of the small group time. We started with the message, then worship, then communion and finished with celebratory worship which lifted the women to amazing praise for all the Lord had done in their hearts. Their final small group time allowed time to see where they had been, the change needed and the prayers and encouragement from their small group members to stand with them as God continued to work as they return home.
There were a couple of little things I brought to the retreat thinking it might be nice to do, but found God using it as breakthroughs for women. One "little" addition was a verse and prayer on a small piece of paper rolled up and tied like a scroll. (There were about nine different passages and a related prayer on each.) I asked the retreat coordinator just to put them on the ladies' chairs on Sunday morning. I was shocked and awed by what happened. Women came in, read their scrolls and were commenting and giving testimony that this verse and prayer was EXACTLY what they needed that morning. One woman said it was the verse she had been given at last year's retreat and someone a week before had quoted it to her again. She said, "No accident here! God wants me to know and believe His word." Another woman had sat in the same seat for each session, but Sunday morning moved to the next chair. The scroll on the new chair was God's message to her. Out of curiosity, she asked the woman in the other chair she had been in all weekend what her scroll verse and prayer were. It was NOT what she needed. God loved her so much, He even had her sit in another seat and gave her His individual word He prepared just for her.
The theme of this weekend was "got love?" God showed His love afresh to all to the point where each of the women attending, if asked if they "got love?" would say, "Oh, yeah!" This was indeed a special women's retreat.
March 18, 2009
Learning or Leaning?
I had one of my low points yesterday morning after watching my husband grow more and more quiet over the desperation of our financial situation. We continue to be "underwater" but somehow pay our bills. Sweet smiles and encouraging words from me just aren't enough. I slipped back into a dismally familiar cave of concern. "Oh, Lord, how long?"
In our morning prayer time together we ask...beg, for assurance to make it one more day. I read the Psalms and identify with David's cries. Will He help? God has a way of answering my prayers in the are while listening to messages on the radio. Yesterday morning's message was on Proverbs 3:5-6,
"Trust the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight."
I've heard, read or said those verses so many times they became bland to me. But hearing them afresh in my despair allowed the light bulb to click on. I had been trusting with all my heart but not abiding any further. I realized I was leaning on my own understanding. Paralized, I thought the only options out of our financial problems were to pay everything off by:
In our morning prayer time together we ask...beg, for assurance to make it one more day. I read the Psalms and identify with David's cries. Will He help? God has a way of answering my prayers in the are while listening to messages on the radio. Yesterday morning's message was on Proverbs 3:5-6,
"Trust the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight."
I've heard, read or said those verses so many times they became bland to me. But hearing them afresh in my despair allowed the light bulb to click on. I had been trusting with all my heart but not abiding any further. I realized I was leaning on my own understanding. Paralized, I thought the only options out of our financial problems were to pay everything off by:
- Selling the house.
- Marty getting a new full time job.
We saw no other option because we were leaning on our own understanding.
I called Marty immediately and told him to go online and listen to the message. It lifted his spirits, too, and we were able to embrace the rest of that portion of Proverbs. By acknowledging we had been leaning on the limited possible solutions to our plight we saw our trust had been limited, too. Goodness and mercy had followed us and we simply needed to acknowledge it was there so we could refocus on the Lord and watch for Him to make our paths straight. We were wandering aimlessly and He gently guided us back to His side.
Our problems are still before us, but God is gently prodding us forward. Where we end up only He knows. However, we know He will stay close reminding us to trust, acknowledge and walk in the path He has set before us.
March 13, 2009
Seek & Wait? Whatever!
How many times has a well-meaning friend said, "Seek the Lord!" or "Wait on the Lord!" in answer to your prayer request? Do you want to scream, "WHATEVER!" and "Thanks for the support." Of course no one is trying to be simplistic or unsympathetic to a painful circumstance, they just don't have a better answer to give.
Just such a circumstance has plagued me for over six months. That's when we put our house on the market. Just in time for the economy to crash. Three years ago we began praying about possibly buying property in the Redding, CA area. After about a year we believed we had the Lord's okay to move forward and make the purchase. This began our prayer regarding when to make plans to sell our home. Since my husband tele-commutes, and travels much of the time, we can live just about anywhere. We committed to refrain from rushing ahead of God's leading and sought Him daily for the next 18 months.
Finally, all of the doors seemed to be flying open to put the house up for sale. We started purging, painting and making repairs. One of the deemed "open doors" was my husband's company requesting some of the staff to go half time for six months to make two of their "quarterly numbers". We thought the timing perfect so he could do much of the prep work on the house and so we could get moved and settled quickly after the anticipated house sale. After all, we lived in Silicon Valley and in an area that was desireable, how much time would we need?
Time wore painfully on. I wondered if friends were growing weary of our plight. I wondered if we were experiencing some consequence of sin unaware. I was asked if we would lower the price; would we take the house off the market or would we rent if it didn't sell? I even had someone ask if I had fasted? PLEASE!
We knew the Lord had directed us in this effort. It was very clear and yet here we sit. What happened? In desperation I daily cried out and God showed Himself. I needed assurance and revival of spirit everyday and He granted it. During an especially fearful time, the Lord impressed upon me to "seek" Him. I thought, "Haven't I been doing that?" but obeyed. The next day I spent hours looking up every reference to "seeking" in Scripture. I saw all of the encumberances in the way of my seeking. I saw the need to simplify and in doing so the assurance and revival I needed became clear. I was flooded with insight into how I could be conformed. (This sparked another blog titled "Make Myself a Purse?" which you can read later.)
The excitement of "seeking the Lord" drove me to try studying "waiting" the next day. The same depth of abandoning all to wait met me with a security I hope to explain. Psalm 40 spoke of this waiting. By doing so patiently I may feel like my foot will slip, but He will keep me on the solid rock. He gives a "new song" everyday to assure me of His presence. I am reminded of all He has done for me over the years and they are too numerous to count. My heart's desire conforms to His will and I find myself grabbing every opportunity to tell others what you have taught me. I stand a little taller because I have confidence in how He works and have not hidden the testimony, but told of it.
He has NOT withheld His love from me even though the enemy throws my poor decisions in my face, nor allowed the enemy to have victory over me. The Holy Spirit has given me the grace to let comments from "nay-sayers" pass. We know we are being watched. Friends, my husband's co-workers, neighbors are all seeing how we walk this trial. It is our desire to walk in a way that causes others to praise Jesus. We are afflicted and needy, but our God will NOT put us aside. He is our Deliverer so we can say "Seek & Wait" and "WHATEVER, it takes Oh, Lord let it be."
How many times has a well-meaning friend said, "Seek the Lord!" or "Wait on the Lord!" in answer to your prayer request? Do you want to scream, "WHATEVER!" and "Thanks for the support." Of course no one is trying to be simplistic or unsympathetic to a painful circumstance, they just don't have a better answer to give.
Just such a circumstance has plagued me for over six months. That's when we put our house on the market. Just in time for the economy to crash. Three years ago we began praying about possibly buying property in the Redding, CA area. After about a year we believed we had the Lord's okay to move forward and make the purchase. This began our prayer regarding when to make plans to sell our home. Since my husband tele-commutes, and travels much of the time, we can live just about anywhere. We committed to refrain from rushing ahead of God's leading and sought Him daily for the next 18 months.
Finally, all of the doors seemed to be flying open to put the house up for sale. We started purging, painting and making repairs. One of the deemed "open doors" was my husband's company requesting some of the staff to go half time for six months to make two of their "quarterly numbers". We thought the timing perfect so he could do much of the prep work on the house and so we could get moved and settled quickly after the anticipated house sale. After all, we lived in Silicon Valley and in an area that was desireable, how much time would we need?
Time wore painfully on. I wondered if friends were growing weary of our plight. I wondered if we were experiencing some consequence of sin unaware. I was asked if we would lower the price; would we take the house off the market or would we rent if it didn't sell? I even had someone ask if I had fasted? PLEASE!
We knew the Lord had directed us in this effort. It was very clear and yet here we sit. What happened? In desperation I daily cried out and God showed Himself. I needed assurance and revival of spirit everyday and He granted it. During an especially fearful time, the Lord impressed upon me to "seek" Him. I thought, "Haven't I been doing that?" but obeyed. The next day I spent hours looking up every reference to "seeking" in Scripture. I saw all of the encumberances in the way of my seeking. I saw the need to simplify and in doing so the assurance and revival I needed became clear. I was flooded with insight into how I could be conformed. (This sparked another blog titled "Make Myself a Purse?" which you can read later.)
The excitement of "seeking the Lord" drove me to try studying "waiting" the next day. The same depth of abandoning all to wait met me with a security I hope to explain. Psalm 40 spoke of this waiting. By doing so patiently I may feel like my foot will slip, but He will keep me on the solid rock. He gives a "new song" everyday to assure me of His presence. I am reminded of all He has done for me over the years and they are too numerous to count. My heart's desire conforms to His will and I find myself grabbing every opportunity to tell others what you have taught me. I stand a little taller because I have confidence in how He works and have not hidden the testimony, but told of it.
He has NOT withheld His love from me even though the enemy throws my poor decisions in my face, nor allowed the enemy to have victory over me. The Holy Spirit has given me the grace to let comments from "nay-sayers" pass. We know we are being watched. Friends, my husband's co-workers, neighbors are all seeing how we walk this trial. It is our desire to walk in a way that causes others to praise Jesus. We are afflicted and needy, but our God will NOT put us aside. He is our Deliverer so we can say "Seek & Wait" and "WHATEVER, it takes Oh, Lord let it be."
June 30, 2008
Is there a 12 Step Program For Bad Cooks?
Oh, my gosh! I need a 12 step program. I put eggs on to boil & ran upstairs to get my calendar. But I saw I had a few emails & began answering them. Then the phone rang & I talked for about 15 minutes. I checked my emails again & realized the attachment I had tried to send did not go through so I sent it again. I heard a funny sound downstairs but thought it was the neighbor children playing with firecrackers in preparation for July 4th. I began to fret about them setting those off late at night on the 4th and got mad already about the noise to come. I heard another sound & thought I better hurry & finish this email & check it out. Something was starting to smell. Gee, I better wait on the email & see what that is. As you have guessed, the eggs exploding were the sounds I heard. White & yellow matted debris lined the wall behind the stove & the floor. The kitchen smelled like my 10th grade chemistry classroom. Oh, you may think me a fool, but at least I did not pick up the pot with my bare hand, but used a towel to get it to the sink. Sigh. Good thing Marty is gone for four days. Maybe by then the smell will be gone.
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